I. 7th of January – So, This Is How It Begins…

What if I told you that if you are brave enough to follow your dreams, and you do what you know is right, you will always win, no matter what the outcome is, and no matter if everyone else thinks you are crazy? What if we are ignoring an elemental part of our consciousness which would help us understand our position as beings part of this reality and Universe?

Hello, my dearest invisible reader. Even if you just started this journey with me, you might already have two questions: who am I and why are you invisible? Both answers are connected, and as we explore down this path together, you will find out that often the answer to one question leads to several more, digging deeper and deeper into the rabbit hole of existence itself. I want to challenge some fundamental concepts we take for granted about ourselves and the reality being unfolded to us one second at the time. The time has come where I feel the urge to break and bend my own mental walls, to its last consequences.

I want to share with you a story. This is a quest towards discovering how Quantum Psychology can change our conceptualisation and perception of the world as we know it. Because, even if you might not be aware of it yet, Quantum Psychology is all around us: in the way we interact with our environment, within that voice inside your mind giving you a sense of existence, in the smallest of particles, and also in the biggest galaxy. I’m offering you to be part of my personal journey aiming to understand a suspicion I – and many others within my generation – have sensed my whole life: there is something about the way we perceive and interact with reality that just doesn’t add up.

The place is here and the moment is now, but the concepts of time and space can be elusive, as we will learn. Because, above all, this is a story about time, space and profound interpersonal connections, and how those three concepts, that we take for granted, can be deceiving to us, even when they present their true nature to us.

This is a dairy, a window to perceive the world from a different perspective than we have been biologically designed to. This is NOT a self-help guide of any sort. If you expect me to inspire or guide you, stop reading now; because the power to write history and find our unique answers lies within each one of us.

Coming back to the first 2 questions: who I am it’s irrelevant; I am you at one point of your life or another; or perhaps someone close to you; or an inexplicable sensation you can feel inside, as real as the sunset, yet how to describe that sunset to a blind person? For the purpose of this book, I am no one; because although we will find plenty of room to embrace the aspects that differentiate each one of us, Quantum Psychology tackles some of the basic principles that bring all us closer, like a common language, impossible to be spoken with words, but universally  understood.

To the second question, why are you invisible to me? I am inviting you to ride with me towards the deepest and darkest corners of my soul and world, whatever it takes and comes with it. Wouldn’t you be cautious if you were about to expose yourself in such way in front of a stranger? Therefore, to me you must be someone perfect to keep the secrets, ideas, situations, failures, goals and plans that I am about to start telling you throughout this unpredictable diary.

Now, let’s clarify what this book is not. This is not a scientific or scholar book, although we will talk about science as the vehicle to understand our own impact as beings in the Universe; this is not strictly novel or autobiography, although the story will present my daily life and the interactions with some of the people in it; this is not a window towards some illuminating objective truth, but my own personal search to find those answers and purpose.

Did you hear that bang? We just knocked down the so-called fourth wall, because I want to tell you my story directly, live and in stereo, with #NoFilters. I might not tell you all the truth, but everything told will be true. There are infinite truths and at the same time only one truth: your own truth, which unveils itself before you through a part of your consciousness that connects you with something higher than your biological self, our Quantum Self. The only universal answer is that you create your own answers.

You might be wondering why now. There are different reasons joint behind the sudden decision to start this project, but only one that matters: that inner raw and fearless sensation, urging me to externalise for posterity all those ideas I have been nurturing throughout my life, and encouraged by recent events. Because a handful of times in life you experience something truly remarkable, life-changing, where you instantly comprehend that the rules governing your life have been re-written. To me, that epiphany of awakening came mirrored as helplessly interconnected, yet confronted, as the two sides of a coin.

In one extreme of the scale, the events recently depicted during the last New Year’s Eve, where I found the ultimate enlighten confirmation of what I have always suspected: there is a part of our consciousness (Quantum Self), rebellious against any given biological limitation, able to bend the laws of linear space-time, powered by the unique entanglement of two conscious beings connecting.

It is like the whisper sensing that there is more to reality than our biological sensory system leads on. To me, that rumour became a deafening scream after New Year’s Eve, dragging me to be talking to you right now.

On the other side of that spectrum, just as some sort of toll to pay for my audacious realisation, comes the liberating curse. Because the moment you learn that there is something dark inside of you, growing, and that it will consume you from the inside until there is nothing alive left in you, it’s also the moment you become free; free from postponing whatever big project you wanted to pursuit; free from making excuses when it comes to settling whatever dispute you have with those you care; free to chase your real goal, and find all the real meanings of existence, whatever that means.

I chose to keep my recently discovered condition in secret, away from everyone I know and care about. I decided that I wouldn’t let that darkness determine the quality of whatever time I have with all of them, and create quality and meaningful time instead. I guess I couldn’t bare the idea of articulating every interaction I had left around the weakest and darkest part of me, in a selfish way. I also resolved to go through whatever it comes in silence, in order to spare any unnecessary pain to those around me, in an unselfish way.

It was when I realised that potentially I wouldn’t be around for much longer, when I resolved to push all my physical, mental and spiritual boundaries to the limit. The physical ones by signing myself to run the Prague marathon in May this year (where I live); the mental ones by starting writing this book, with the determination to uncover and interconnect all my life-long ideas around Quantum Psychology and its implications; and my spiritual ones by allowing myself to truly connect with those around me that truly matter.

But, in order to do all that, or anything remarkable in life for what’s worth, we all need our unique source of inspiration, our muse, our Venus.  That reason to keep us going and focused in the moments of despair; like a beacon or the brightest star during the darkness night, reminding us what the real goal is, and why we cannot give up no matter what.

Of course, there is The Girl; and not just any girl, as you will see, but the type of girl you understand since the moment you set eyes on her that she will be a part of your life always, no matter how far you travel in time or space. The type of girl worth losing your mind for and challenging everything you believe in. The kind of girl you cannot stop caring about independently of the circumstances, because deep inside you know what you feel is so real that there is nothing you wouldn’t do to make her laugh.

In my case, my time perspective to make her laugh and be with her has been severely reduced, obliging me to cast aside any insecurity or mind games when it comes to her. After all, I cannot think of any better way to spend my limited time and accumulate experiences while I can, than feeling the way only her can make me feel when she is near me. Cowardly, I must also spare her from the truth of my condition, so that I can harvest more of those moments with her.

I cannot anticipate where this journey will take us, nor could the wisest person in the world, or even what I am expecting to get out of it. All I have is a resolute inner sensation of determination and vision, encouraging me to endeavour this trail. Because what you are to this world, and those around us, can be written in an instant of pure conviction.

This will not be a comfortable or easy quest, but one filled with frustration, setbacks and discouragement. It does not matter, as failure doesn’t come from defeat; failure only comes from not trying or giving up on what you know as true. Nothing worth experiencing and that allows personal growth will ever come in a straight line; instead, the road will twist and wrestle with your most basic principles and assumptions.

Through Quantum Psychology I want to discover whether some of the biggest questions ever conceived might have an answer: what’s the meaning of life, why is the Universe the way it is, what happens after we die, where is God in all this… Around these riddles, there will be a real human story, coating and giving the true meaning to everything else. Because Quantum Psychology cannot be understood unless you combine both: the hard-cold science and the uncontrollable and flaming spiritual energy contained in life. And nothing fires this world brighter than the boldest feelings, especially the ones that make sense mostly only to you.

Sometimes in life you cannot connect the dots by looking forward, but you can only connect them by looking backwards, and then fully understanding why you had to go through that journey in order to reach your real destiny. After all, life starts on a rooftop and it’s up to us to crawl down from there or aim for the stars instead.

Be warned that you will be crossed with ideas that you will disagree with; others that might make no sense to you at all; some will question who you are and how much influence you really have in how reality unfolds. But hopefully none of them will make you indifferent.Are you ready to walk this uncertain journey with me for as long as I am able to? Whatever happens at the end, if it comes to that, let my gift be my curse; our discovery and growth along the way will make it worth it.

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